Often your emotions are so stirred up that it can be very difficult to come up with words of condolence for those that need them. Funeral or memorial services are also a means to share in the pain and express love for the deceased in order to heal.
While such responses are fairly common, there's really no cause for worry. Standing up in front of so many of her friends and family to say the final goodbye's helped me to finally accept that she'd gone, even though it was the hardest thing I'd ever had to do in my life. In the event of the deceased having led a life that was terribly hard for them, or they were ill towards the end of their life, leave that part out.
The need to talk is an outlet of letting out all of their feelings about the situation. The family is free to participate as much or little as they wish in the funeral. A Celebrant will honor a family's wishes and will present either a religious or non-religious gathering.
Death is hard to accept but can be made easier by the love extended by people who truly care. Be sure, though, not to include anything that may offend or embarrass.
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